The Red Carpet query “who are you wearing” is no longer query enough. It’s now “turn around and let me read your back” or “your arm” or “chest” or…

I thought I might include some of these overly wordy, sometime literary referenced, totally obtuse sentiments for your pleasure reading. Then, I thought, why?  For me, call me old fashioned, but I prefer the really simple, straightforward, and truly meaningful type of tattoo. Homage where homage is due.

If you really really need to know whose sporting what, you can google, or watch the Oscars.

In the meantime, what I really wonder about is what ‘fill in your celebrity’ was thinking during the moment of being inked. I suppose, though, if you can name your child Apple, Sailor Lee or Sage Moonblood (all real, not kidding) and not consider the consequences, you can do whatever else you want to your body parts.

Unless you don’t plan ever ever ever to age, have you considered what ultimately happens to that sharply defined piece of art you’d be sporting? Not the look you once thought you were going for, I imagine.

I, for one, know I’ll never get a tattoo.

You see, I don’t even wear T shirts with sayings on them.