Or, better yet, blow your whistle.

And make a fortune doing it.

Are you a 'soon to be retired' or 'disgruntled with your current position" person, daydreaming about an alternative life style? Are you second guessing how much you have put away for your golden years? Still a working stiff and fearful that you are not saving enough? Has you pension been decimated? 

Well here's a thought.

Participate in some slightly nefarious activity, not one that you concocted of course, just have some compliance in executing. Watch, wait, wait and watch and then when the time is ripe, call in the Feds.

Let's consider Bradley C. Birkenfeld.  A private banker for UBS, he divulged the tax evasion secrets of its wealthy, well heeled clientele.  Not watching from the sidelines, mind you, he participated eagerly and willingly. For which, alas, he is going to prison.

And suing for a multi billion dollar reward from the US government. That would be multi billions. 

Let's consider. Jail time, Billionaire.  Hmmm.

Not for you? Me neither. So, squirrel away your pennies, keep your nose to the grindstone and play the lottery.

HAVE A HAPPY THANKSGIVING ALL

                                   HAPPY  SLICING  DICING  CHOPPING

My expectation when I close the stall door in a public bathroom is to come face to face with a sign telling me “only flush toilet tissue,” or “protect your belongings.”

You too?

So, imagine my surprise, amusement, confusion, bemusement when I gazed up into this sign.
My first thought was, “is this the equivalent of the mile high club” for people who desire a roomier environment? It was after all, a pretty commodious commode.

My second thought was to rethink my first thought. Maybe they aren’t cautioning the inhabitants to refrain from a sexual liason, but rather to another illicit activity. Drug deals, anyone?

Seems to me, in either case, that I was clearly in an environment whose usual clientale was probably a tad more hip and trendy than my local cheesburger, cheeseburger hang out.

I’m not naive enough to believe that various and assorted nefarious activities don’t take place ….just that they are not, in gleaming stainless steel, warned against.

I’ll have to refrain myself when I go back there.

I might have to do something really daring. Leave the seat up?

I catch cold, snippets of gossip, flack for misdeeds. 
Catching a poisonous Black Mamba snake, not so much.

I was half listening to an NPR broadcast. The interviewer was talking to (I ultimately found out) Thea and Clifton Koen about their personal mission to catch and capture these poisonous creatures.

Really, I thought, Jewish snake catchers? My head shot up. After a few more minutes of listening it became evident that these two Koen's were not of the tribe. 

Nonetheless, what did strike me is what some folks undertake. Outside of the daily routine, that is. Imagine, brush teeth, comb hair, wrestle a snake into submission, have coffee, maybe a croissant. 

I do have these momentary lapses where I imagine myself doing something infinitely more noble and heroic than I currently do. Yeah, yeah, I do volunteer and I appreciate that is a very good thing to do.

But, what I am talking about here is the heart racing, knees knocking, sweat forming, breath holding acts of courage and heroism. I am talking about documentaries being shot to record this fearless act. I am talking about folksongs, books. Monuments. 

I'm exhausted.

And, I am clearly not the only soul with this fantasy. Think "Up the Sandbox", "Zelig", "The Incredible Life of Walter Mitty," to name just a few.

But, for me, for now, I can only add rainbows and pipe dreams. I can catch glimpses of those anytime I want.

Whew, that's a relief, the Times reported this week that Doomsday in the year 2012 isn't going to happen.

Clearly, when they made this announcement, they didn't consider that the "Going Rogue" author, Sarah Palin might be considering a Presidential run for that very same year. Having seen her on the media bandwagon this past week, I can state, with certainty, that the Mayans had to be referencing her as a catastrophic event. But, she does have great eye wear.

As for more immediate space odyssey events, this week we are/have/did experience Leonid's Meteor Shower. I clearly was absent the week that my eighth grade science teacher talked about asteroids, comets and meteors  so in a moment of wanting to learn something I looked up the differences. Certain that I do not really need to  know this, I nonetheless am providing the information for you to peruse. No pop quizzes.

So, I dutifully set my alarm in anticipation of watching the phenomenon. Upon hearing the buzz I did what you all know you'd do, I hit the button, rolled over and went back to sleep. I figured that the concept of star gazing was infinitely more romantic, then the actuality of wandering into my backyard, swathed in an over sized tee shirt and sweatpants, looking up into the haze and smog of Brooklyn, hoping to see something, anything that resembled a shower of meteors..

Thank heaven for you tube, or the news or The Weather Channel. I will, later this evening, watch the celestial light show, and report back to you on what you might have missed.

Great word.

Angelina, Lindsay, Britney. No last names required, right? You knew exactly whom I was referencing. They are the poster women for my new favorite word. Now, if I mention Craig? Would you immediately know which Craig? 

Alrighty then, some of you immediately knew which Craig. Like in list. Like in being able to find, locate, opt for, chat with, learn how, avoid, "Craigslist." 

But, I wasn't fully appreciative as to how, brace yourself, ubiquitous, (it, he, them?) is. Voyeur that I am, I read, with some fascination, the Times article Better to Have Loved and Lost a compilation of, in this instance, poems of unrequited love, lifted from the missed connections…MISSED CONNECTIONS?? on CraigsLIst.

So sad.

But, in trying to figure out how to find, read, snicker, empathize, with the rest of the "missed connections" stories, lo and behold, I found that there are about a zillion discussion groups going on there.

Who knew?

Give yourself a user name and jump right in. Tax reform, religion, polyamory (yup, it's a discussion group), literature (I think there were 2 people signed up for this one). And, Craigslist is international, you can participate in any discussion in any country you'd like.

Now clearly, I have acknowledged that I am in the last car, of the last train in how to really participate in the on line space. So, perhaps, you already were aware that you could become a member of any group that would have you.  

During your rooting about for more mundane items like  lessons, an apartment or a summer rental, you too have the opportunity to have a moment of being ubiquitous. 

Not famous, of course. Just all over the place.