I like my side effects to be along the lines of dizziness, headaches, that sort of thing, don’t you?

However, with obesity (or severely chunky, or thighs rub when you walk, or not fitting into anything you own) which are also scientifically valid labels, a race is on to find a prescription drug to, yup,”diminish” the problem.

It remains medicine’s elusive goal. 

The companies that are developing this new generation of drugs have “tried to avoid side effects that have tripped up drugs in the past.” Does anyone remember fen-phen?  If I remember accurately, the side effect was death. And, even if you attained your ideal weight, that seems to be bitter sweet, don’t you think?

I am delighted to announce that I have found a sure fire solution to the obesity problem.

Masking tape.

Directions: apply a  4″ strip across closed lips. Side effects, depilation of mustache or other facial hair. Weight loss: guaranteed